Why do good things happen to those who do not even know Him?

I have been asked this question a couple of times. Even by people closest to me.

Early this morning God gave me the answer.

Ever ordered something in a restaurant and still want to take a bite of someone else's order?

Ever asked yourself, why didn't I order that? Why is his/her order better than mine? Why is his/her life better than mine? When in fact I know God?

Going back to the restaurant, I am very guilty of that. Every time Jason and I would eat out, I would often look longingly at his plate, and wish I'd ordered the same thing. Please excuse me, but I'd poke my fork first in his plate before I take a bite of my dish.

My friend, Toneth mentioned that to me earlier about always wanting someone else's order. In general, we would always look at the other's plate, we would always want someone else's life if not a bite of it. Even if we were sure that what we specifically asked for is what we wanted, there goes our envious heart comparing ourselves to others.

Last Sunday I was blessed to hear the message The Lord is My Shepherd by Pastor Peter Tan-Chi. In a nutshell it talks about the relationship between a sheep and its shepherd that is comparable to us and our relationship with God.

Everything about it was really impactful and these three verses I hold dear and which answer the question, Why do good things happen to those who do not even know Him?

1. Psalm 23:1 The Lord is my Shepherd, I have everything I need.

Sheeps are the most dependent of the animals. It often goes astray, finds itself in trouble, and is totally helpless that they cannot eat on their own. Without a shepherd, the sheep will get lost, get eaten by wolves, and die of hunger.

The good shepherd takes care of his sheep. The good shepherd cares deeply for his sheep. He provides his sheep with everything that they need. He feeds his sheep, gives them protection and security.

John shares with us who the good shepherd is - Jesus is the good shepherd.

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John 10:11-14

"I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep.The hired hand is not the shepherd and does not own the sheep. So when he sees the wolf coming, he abandons the sheep and runs away. Then the wolf attacks the flock and scatters it.The man runs away because he is a hired hand and cares nothing for the sheep.

"I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me—"

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The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep and protects them with all  he can. Jesus is our good shepherd who has laid down his life for us.

If God is our shepherd, we believe that He has given us everything that we will ever need. One thing that struck me last week was from Joy Tan-Chi's blog about what her mom told her, "There will always be someone more beautiful and smarter (and even richer, wittier, faster, etc.) in this world but God has given you everything you need to do his will and work".

It is our sinful heart that tends to always look the other way, look at others blessings and be envious of their lives. But with knowing that God is our shepherd, we can be assured that He has given us all that we need. We do not need to look the other way, but look instead deep in our hearts why we are having those feelings of jealousy or envy.

God is my shepherd. He has given me everything that I will ever need. He is my shepherd who has provided for me not only what I need, but so much more than what  I originally asked for.

2. Psalm 23:2 He lets me rest in green pastures. He leads me to calm water.

There is a saying that "the grass is greener on the other side". I heard this phrase a lot of times in high school at the peak of Filipinos migrating to the US, to Canada since the grass is greener there.

Our appetites are insatiable. We will never be contented nor be satisfied with what we have. We will always look at the greener side, the greener pasture, the better offering, the better life. Well who doesn't want to have a better life? Graze in greener pastures?

But when we know that God is our good shepherd, we know that even if we dislike where we are in - if we feel dead end in our work, our situation, our lives, WE TRUST that this is the greener pasture. God has put us here for a reason, for us to grow to know Him more, for us to love Him more and love the people around us more. It may be difficult and we want out. But the grass can't get any greener than this place where we are in. We may not understand it now because we feel differently. We feel hopeless sometimes. But we do not let ourselves be ruled by our emotions. We let ourselves be guided by the truth.

And the truth is this: That God loves us. He is our good shepherd. He lets us rest in green pastures. He leads us to calm water. Where we can take our fill and satisfy our thirst.

3. Psalm 23:4 Even if I walk through a very dark valley, I will not be afraid, because you are with me. Your rod and staff protect me.

A sheep with a good shepherd will never fear walking through a very dark valley. Because it knows that the shepherd would ward off the wolves and other threats using his staff. It knows that the shepherd will protect him.

As sheeps would often wander, the shepherd would sometimes use his rod to break off its leg. This is so that the sheep would not wander and endanger themselves to the point of no return. While the leg heals, the shepherd would carry his sheep on his shoulder. And when the sheep heals and is able to walk again, it would then know who the shepherd is and then choose to follow him.

Sometimes in our lives we would often encounter the discipline of God. Sometimes when we would often go astray, find ourselves fallen into temptation, God would discipline us. We would get angry, get hurt, but God assures us of His grace that He would carry us through. Having this encounter, we would then know God more and choose to follow Him.

If we were never broken, who knows what more danger awaits us, what more trouble we could not get ourselves out of. Jesus is the good shepherd who protects us.

Darkness is everywhere and there is always a threat of danger around us. But as Pastor Peter says, "Security is not the absence of danger, it is being in the presence of God" We are assured of safety, we are assured of His presence.

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Sometimes when we ask ourselves, why  is their life better than mine, ask yourselves again who is God to you? Who is He in your life?

Why look at others when you can look to God who is your shepherd?

We really can't say and choose who God should bless or not. But instead of having these feelings, I look into the attitude of my heart, find comfort in God and find comfort in His many promises.

God never withholds any good things from those who walk uprightly, who do what is right (Psalm 84:11)

Romans 8:28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

Living with and for the risen Christ

Being raised in a Catholic family, in a Catholic school, and undergoing several theology courses (which I studiously read and researched about), I knew for a fact who Jesus was, his life in general and that Jesus died and was raised on the third day.

It was the same old story every Holy Week for me. But really, what does the risen Jesus mean to me or to my life?

Did it actually even mean anything to me? Why is that most of the time our lives are as if he were not alive? Why is it that we do not reflect the risen Jesus in us? Why are we still angry people, lonely people, anxious and frustrated people living routinary and dead-end lives?

This Holy Week was different to me. This year I was blessed to have attended a retreat, Live Like You Mean It, and also heard the service in CCF by Pastor Peter, Jesus and Pastor Bong's afternoon service.

Live Like You Mean It in a nutshell taught me how to Live passionately for God despite the many failures in life, God is our strength - our abilities are limitless. He is the perfect image of success as He rose from the dead. No one can ever measure to His victory and as children of God, we draw life and strength from our father to reach our fullest potential - to be Christlike in every way. He is our father who adds everything unto us as we seek Him first and accept Him in our hearts. (Matthew 6:33)

In the service, we are faced with the truth about Jesus Christ.

Knowing about Christ, we come to encounter 2 Christians:

1. Traditional Christians who go according to tradition yet fail to deliver when asked why they believe and what they believe in.

2. True Followers of Jesus who know Jesus, strive to know him sincerely and are ready to die for him.

How many of us can honestly say that we are ready to die for Christ?

As Pastor Peter says, unless we are ready to die for Jesus are we ready to live for Him.

We do not know how it is to live for Christ if we cannot give up our lives for Him.

TRUTH IS EXCLUSIVE.

There is an absolute TRUTH.

 I used to argue that truth is relative to  respect individuality. But if truth is relative than 2 + 2 can be 10 or 100.

We can tolerate but we have to acknowledge that there is truth and we should speak the truth in love. Jesus is the way, the truth and the life. If you are not for him, then you are against him. There is no gray area. It's either you believe in Him or you don't. It matters because in the end it will be just you and Him, and Him knowing if you have lived your life for God.

Why should we follow Christ? How does he stand out from all the others?

His birth was unique - He was born of the Virgin Mary.

His teachings are unsurpassed - to love your enemies as yourself which is the highest moral standard.

His whole life was unique - He gave sight to the blind, He brought the dead to life, He walked on water among many others.

His death and His resurrection was unique - How many others out there have died and have rose again? How many others will tell about their own death and resurrection?

The difference of His life and death is that there was proof.

And many even until now are living witnesses to Jesus.

Many atheists like C.S. Lewis have brought their life to Christ. The greatest example in their time was Paul. He was the chief persecutor of Christians but when he met Christ, he chose to die for Him. Most of the New Testament books was written byPaul - the most evil, horrible person then who crucified Christians and stoned them to death. He had blood on his hands and yet the transforming power of Christ restored him and gave him a devoted commitment and a 180 degree change in his life.

1. Other proofs that Jesus lived was that many historians and hostile witnesses wrote about him. They acknowledged he existed in letters telling they wanted Christians killed because of "this Jesus Christ".

2. The Empty Tomb was proof that he died and rose again. Romans are the most discplined soldiers. For letting a prisoner escape means death to them. The tomb was sealed, waxed and guarded by soldiers. But no Pharisee, no King, no soldier, no collaborative might from the authorities can stop Jesus from rising again.

3. Women of that time weren't regarded as important. But it was written that the first witnesses of Jesus' resurrection were 2 women: Mary and Mary Magdalene. The latter was not just any woman, she was regarded lower than women because she was treated as unclean. Why write that women are witnesses? And an "unclean" woman at that was the first to testify?

4. Lives of the Disciples. Peter who declared to follow Jesus wherever he went shrunk away when asked if he knew Jesus Christ. Even denying him 3 times. But after the resurrection all were brave to face persecutions and even death. Nothing and no one can stop them from proclaiming that Jesus was alive.

5. Thomas. Doubting Thomas. If you knew him, you would know that he is very much like us. We need PROOF to know that something exists, very much like him. When he doesn't believe, it would take much to convince him. It would take long debates, senseless arguments. But once he saw Jesus and placed his hands in Jesus' wounds, he went all out for Him.

God appreciates an honest seeker, he knows your heart and will take the initiative to show that he is Lord like what he did with Thomas.

With all the proofs and the living witnesses of Christ, we know that Jesus rose again. We can hold on to his promise of the forgiveness of sins, victory over sin and an amazing future of eternal life. We can hold on to bible verses - His living word. We know that God is alive.

When you encounter Jesus, you can never be the same. Just look at how much people are transformed and are willing to die. How unbelievers turned to become committed followers. How much wisdom the people we thought foolish possesses. How much strength we thought people who are weak have. Life is never the same.

What is the difference of our faith?

Christianity is never afraid. It is not afraid to be scrutinized, it can be studied and investigated, its proofs are piling up and the truth remains. As you study further, you will know the truth and the truth will set you free. You can never truly study  or know Christ and come out the same person.

I used to rush into arguments when something about my faith is being doubted by others. But I never really knew Christ then. I was afraid to pick up my Bible and confirm what is true. I was lazy and trusted whatever my professors / priests taught me.

But the moment I started reading and started having a relationship with God, I appreciated more what they taught me and it has been the most enjoyable and experiential theology I have ever had.

Knowing and seeing proof that Christ alive begs my first question then,

What does it mean then to live for Christ?

We have been dead. Living a tired, frustrated, angry, lonely, miserable and meaningless life. But all these cause of sins have been nailed to the cross and have died with Jesus Christ. Because he paid for our sins, we are a new creation and we are resurrected to a new life in Christ if we accept this gift from God. An abundant life awaits our sincere acceptance of this truth.

Seeing the proofs that He has resurrected, we can live for Christ and hold on to His promise that He shall be back again. Our love and service for Christ and for others will never be in vain, because we claim in the proof that he lives. (1 Cor 15:58)

If we truly know Him, we will love and serve Him with all our heart, mind, soul and strength. Or else we can choose to remain living a lukewarm, shallow Christian life and be deprived of a meaningful, abundant, and worry-free life with Christ.

You may choose to continue living an empty life, work for your salvation or you can start resting in the power and strength of Jesus Christ.

Life has never been the same for me when I knew Him. As my friend once reminded me, God did not promise life with Him would be easy, but that He would be there for me and deliver me. I hold on to His promise that life with Him is more abundant, more meaningful and filled with love than I have ever imagined it could be. :)

Surfing 101: Finding your inner peace

I finally got to tick one off my bucket list!  And I'm just glad to come out of it in one piece with just a few bruises on my knee. =)

Life is too short to be overcome by fears and worries. So I guess it's about time to live life the way it should be. Last Saturday I've finally rose above my fear of sea swimming without a life vest (yes I'm proud of that :p). I'm such a wuss really and huge waves scare the heck out of me. But in Surfing 101, you've got to learn to embrace the huge waves and soon you'll be able to ride it smoothly.

In Sebay, La Union my friends and I dared to take on the challenge.

We each had our surfing instructors and for 1 hour at P400 only (which they guaranteed to return if we failed to stand up), my guide holds my life.

1st we were taught about surfing terms like long board and its parts - nose and tail, among other things.

[caption id="attachment_615" align="aligncenter" width="510" caption="Getting ready to surf"][/caption]

Safety instructions were:

1. When we have to jump off the board, we should jump at the back of the board or on its side. Never in front.

2. If we get toppled over, we had to cover our heads to guard it from the possible blow of the board.

3. Once we part with our board at sea and we're all settled, we should pull on the cord that links our ankles to the board so it won't be tossed and turned all around us.

With all those warnings said, I just had to go and see for myself what they meant - I experienced (unintentionally) the don't s of 1 & 2.

How?

I jumped in front to have the board hit my hips. (Good job to me :P)

On the next, I fell over and the board crashed on top of my head. Experienced some wardrobe malfunction so I just hid under the board while fixing my stuff. Since there were waves the board kept hitting my head so I got dizzy again and again. Hello stars under water.

Now you see that surfing is really a feat. Once you get hold of these 3s's you're sure to claim this achievement as well :)

3S of Surfing 101

1. Swing- Once our guide gives the signal to get ready, from lying on our chest position, we had to swing our right leg up with our right foot against our inner left thigh.

[caption id="attachment_616" align="aligncenter" width="510" caption="Steps 2, 1 and 3 =)"][/caption]

2. Stand - Draw your hand up to your chest and push with all your might. At this point, your right foot should be lying flat on the board, and your left leg should be positioned in front of your right.

The instructors were really good. They went over the steps with us thoroughly until we could coordinate it all in one swift movement. So don't worry they'll show you what I mean.

[caption id="attachment_621" align="aligncenter" width="510" caption="Step 2 - To Stand"][/caption]

Now that you've stood up comes another challenging task - balance.

Lucky you if you get it on the first try like Jason. But to us normal people, it takes a number of falling, picking yourself up, and heaving yourself up on top of the board to ride the rhythm of the waves.

It is a lot similar with how we should approach life. The more you try, fail, and yet continue to get on your feet, the closer you are to finding your balance.

3. Surf - Now that you've swung and stood up comes the best part - surfing and riding the waves. The instructor will give you a little push to get momentum from the waves and then you're on your way.

I remember what Julz said, "surfing is a matter of freeing and emptying your mind." Truly it is. I noticed that the more I thought about my fear or that I am pressured to stand up, the more I couldn't find my balance. But once I focused on that moment alone and freed myself from my fears and doubts, I was able to become one with the sea and glide through waves smoothly.

 

[caption id="attachment_622" align="aligncenter" width="510" caption="Riding the waves"][/caption]

It's a matter of reaching your zen zone - that inner peace (credits to Kung Fu Panda). You've got to let loose, and let your mind run free. And soon enough riding the waves would really be a breeze.

[caption id="attachment_624" align="aligncenter" width="510" caption="Now this is what you call inner peace"][/caption]

At first I didn't think I could stand up. I even had a hard time getting on my board. As I peered left and right, I saw my surf mates on their board, poised to ride. But there I was, struggling to carry my weight and my instructor probably growing impatient and wanting to give me the lift I badly needed.  It took a while for me to get on top of my board.

But after that first fall, it didn't take much coaxing for me to get back on it. I was determined to stand up. Wardrobe malfunction or not, ab cramps and all, I just had to do it.

The moment I was able to do it truly it was the sweetest surf ride I've had in my life.

 Amidst the noise of the sea and the crashing of waves, I found the balance I needed and experienced the most peaceful connection with myself.

[caption id="attachment_625" align="aligncenter" width="510" caption="Surfing 101 graduates!"][/caption]

So here's to my surf mates who have embraced the waves and encountered inner peace. Congratulations guys we did it! :D

If you still don't know what I'm talking about, you've got to try surfing - also to cross one off your bucket list :)

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Sebay Surf Resort

San Juan, La Union

 

Happy Father’s Day, Mom:You Will Always Be My Hero

Repost from write up in CCF website for Train Your Children Sunday message.

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Today June 19, 2011 is Father’s Day. One day that honors all the fathers who have worked countless hours to be able to provide and more. But also, one day that magnifies how much my supermom is both a mother and a father to me.

Also today on Jose Rizal’s birthday, I would like to declare that my mom is my hero; she is my model in every way. My supermom is everything to me. She not only took the role of providing for me and my sister, but she was also hands on with us and taught us much. I can never think of a time that she wasn’t present in my life. Even if she worked 9 hours a day, she has mastered the art of juggling priorities – I always felt her presence. More than these, my mom has also taught me how to pray. I love to read and she used this passion of mine to teach me about God and moral character through Children’s Bible Stories and other reading materials. I was taught to talk to God, encouraged to tell him the desires and intentions of my heart.

I am very grateful for my mom and for her introducing God to me and likewise; however I could not deny that the absence of my father or having a father-figure was an obstacle in my spiritual life. My prayer couldn’t go past graces before meal time or the daily morning “thank you for another day to celebrate the miracle of life”. I couldn’t fully open up and have a deeper, fulfilling relationship because I did not know how to treat a father. Most especially when I felt no effort from the other end and had the feeling that I was not thought of, unimportant and unloved by the one person who should reflect God.

But truly, through the message I was reminded that if we have a father who can’t forgive you or does not like you, it does not mean that God is so. His outstretched arms signify otherwise, He does not love little. His love is so great and immeasurable that it overflows.

Praise God indeed He has His ways to always reach out to me; He spoke to my spiritual mentor in college for me to be able to confront this dilemma. I realized then that though my earthly father might be absent, my heavenly father is far much greater, His presence more than enough, He is the very constant in my life.

As I opened my heart to the service today, I could not help but appreciate my mom all the more on Father’s Day. Pastor Peter said, “A father is worth more than 100 teachers”. I believe so, and my mom who stood as a father to me was not only worth a hundred teachers but she is much much more.

Let me end with one conversation I had with my mom a week ago. I was sharing to her how blessed I was to have been able to hear the family series in CCF. I was telling her about having positive relationships and intentional teaching so she may also share these with her friends and new parents. I told her these are a tremendous help to me should I be blessed to have children someday or spiritual children no less. After sharing these, my mom’s question left a mark on me: Did I regret my past? How she raised me was quite different from what I learned recently.

It took me a while to answer her. Then I finally said, No Mom. I do not regret my past. I do not regret anything because everything brought me to this moment that I may be able to testify of God’s movement in my life for His greater glory. I wouldn’t want my history to be any other way.

Mom, I wouldn’t want any other parent to teach me about what I know. I still have a lot to learn from you. You are my best Teacher and my HERO. Mom, you are more than enough, never were you less. Mom, YOU are the greatest blessing. YOU are God’s best.

The Wisdom of Teaching Intentionally (part 2 of 2)

On Teaching Intentionally to both biological and spiritual children, we not only teach them about themselves but we also should teach them how to relate to their environment, and their friends.

II. About Friends

(A.) Their friends will impact them either positively or negatively.

 Pastor Peter advises his kids that they should be friendly to everyone, but they should choose who to be close with, Who to be with around with.

As Proverbs 13:20 states, He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.

Some friends may pull you up, influence you to do good, study harder, and just simply bring out the best in you. But there are also those kind of people who will drag you down. Even if you are raised to be of good moral character, sometimes peer pressure gets the best of you. In 1 Corinthians 15:33 we are reminded that “Bad company corrupts good character.” But though they are in that situation, God will always always provide a way out as Paul Tan-Chi, Pastor Peter's son, testified. There will never be a trial or temptation that will be too much to handle and too much that you couldn't overcome.

On the subject of smoking or drinking which usually surfaces as early as high school, and even more rampant in college, your children will have to face this sooner or later. Will they fall, will they stand? What should you say?

Remind them of this: 1 Corinthians 10:23-24 "Everything is permissible”—but not everything is beneficial. “Everything is permissible”—but not everything is constructive.  Nobody should seek his own good, but the good of others.

Every time they attempt to smoke or to drink, let them ask themselves, how in any way is this beneficial? Am I doing this for God's greater glory?

Always let your children think twice. Let them be intentional in things that they do and not like a feather in the wind -  no direction, easily swayed.

(B.) The importance of priority

Friends are important but they are NOT the most important. We were given a priority list.

1st God

2nd Family

3rd Studies/Responsibilities

4th Friends

With the help of the priority list, they would be given a perspective on what they should put first in their lives.

WE were also taught the same idea Pastor Peter taught his kids: treat your family like you treat your best friend.

Some people may be mean to their siblings, or disrespectful to their parents, but when it comes to friends, they put out their best selves.

 (B.) It is impractical to have a Boyfriend/Girlfriend early in high school/college until they are ready to get married.

It is indeed impractical because you are closing your options, ruining the chance to be able to meet new friends, try new things. It is true that having an immature relationship hinders you from reaching your potential. There is always the jealousy or the insecurity of their bf/gf being with someone else, or  doing activities without them.

In worse cases these relationships could cause them to sin. Then the scare. Then the pregnancy. Then the stage when they are forced into adulthood when they are the least ready.

When this happens, there is no turning back. They have fallen into the deepest hole, difficult to pull them back.

Parents you do not want this to happen to your children, so as early as now teach them what is right. Teach them the value of waiting for the right person, the joy of finding the right one. That moment couldn't be more perfect. Their life lived with no regrets.

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Some people take parenthood lightly. Some people my age would even want to already be parents even when they're not ready. They do not understand the huge responsibility.

 If you want to raise your child right then you have to be INTENTIONAL in teaching them. From the way to bathe themselves, how to do their homework. From the littlest of things to the bigger decision-making ones. Would you rather have them learn from school or their friends what you should be teaching them? No one could raise them best than you with the guidance of the Holy Spirit and the grace of Christ.

The wisdom then of teaching intentionally is this: you will raise children who have a good head on their shoulders. They are ready to face the world, they are ready to serve. And what could be more fulfilling than knowing that your child is able to make the wisest decisions and make a wonderful life of his/her own. You cannot be more proud as a parent. In raising your child the best way you can, being 100% present, you have done your duty in bringing glory and honor to Christ.

3C's of Building Positive Relationships: Connect, Communicate, Compliment

Yesterday's message at CCF was very soulful. I was very blessed to have heard and witnessed the message which was about Building Positive Relationships - an excerpt from Pastor Peter Tan-Chi's sermon at Pastor Bong's 2pm service.

Every human is a relational being. We are built to have relationships with each other, relate to God and to one another. As it is always said, the family is the basic unit of society. Within the family these relationships are developed, built and strengthened. However it is also within the family relationships have the potential to be broken.

It is then important for us to nourish the relationships that we have at home as early as you can to be able to have the best relationships with people around you. It all begins with how the parents raise and relate to their children.

(1)

We are given 3 concrete steps on Building Positive Relationships. 1st of which is to CONNECT.

Parents usually busy themselves with work and other things that they forget how to become parents to their children, how to become the support system their children needs. Some might rationalize that today's environment is very competitive, it's a dog eat dog world out there. We have to work hard for our children, everything we do is for them anyway. Then they go home tired, cranky and just plain drained of every day's work load. Too tired to listen, too tired to connect, too tired to become a parent.

For 2 weeks that I was able to become independent of my mom since she visited my cousin abroad, I personally felt the drain of taking care of myself,  everything and everyone else around the house. Leading me to wonder how parents could possibly do all these and even sustain all these things and with kids no less.

I honestly salute all parents and especially those who despite of being the working parents they are still manage to be there for their children. However I am quite disappointed with those who aren't there more so those who don't even make an effort to be there.

Because even if you play the role of the busy, overworked parent, you can still CONNECT with your children. But if you think life is already too much for you, or for those who aren't married yet and think having a family will solve all your relationship issues, then please don't be a parent.

When you say CONNECT, it means speaking your children's language, knowing their interest and doing what they like. It means watching cartoons with them even if you'd rather watch the evening news. It means bonding with them over food they enjoy which most of the time means fast food. It means being involved with their interests and activities. It means building bridges to your child's heart.

(2)

2nd C of Building Positive Relationships is to COMMUNICATE.

Think of this: busy parents off to work, come back home, spend little to no time with their children, then children try to get the attention of parents, do bad in school, get called in the office so on and so forth. Then parents scold them, give them a spanking, punish them to no end.

Does this look right to you?

Some parents believe their way is the only way. What they say goes. Obey me OR ELSE.

They use their Size and Position to discipline their children. I am bigger. I am your mother. I am your father.

One thing I remember from Pastor Tan-Chi is that you can be strict if you have a relationship. He is like that with his children. Once you have built a relationship with your children, they will understand that behind every NO is your bigger concern for them. They would know that behind every NO is for their own good.

Parents also have the tendency to CORRECT.

Their children would open up to them whether about daily musings or decision making and here the parents come judging and correcting. Would the child still open up if parents are so? Little by little parents would lose involvement in their child's life and their influence would be no more. Slowly children would ease their parents out of the picture even in major decision making where parents would usually want to become a part of.

COMMUNICATION then is not "Did you do your homework? Good" or even less "How could you do that!! You are such a naughty child!!" Or worse, I dare not say.

COMMUNICATION is about LISTENING more than anything. Listen to them in their joys, their frustrations. STRETCH YOUR PATIENCE, JUST LISTEN. Stop yourself from giving advice, criticizing, correcting. There is always a right moment for talking, hear them out first then control and filter yourself in speaking out your peace. Not only would you build a relationship with them but you will also gain their trust and their confidence in everything.

(3)

Last C of Building Positive Relationships is COMPLIMENT.

Correct me if I'm wrong but men aren't usually expressive. Fathers might be so as well. They see their kid performing well in school, well and good. They see their kid doing bad, they start to talk. and talk. and talk. Some don't even talk, they let their kids experience physical punishment alongside mental torture. They give them the belt, the basement, the attic, everything really horrible and traumatic.

Pastor Bong is right, a speck of dust on a white sheet we see, but we don't see that the white is much greater than that dust. We don't see the bigger picture. Everyone is like that. Parents included.

Everyone needs to be accepted and affirmed. Some just might need more affirmation than others as per Love Languages. Children need those too. They become confident if their parents believe in them. They are pushed to do more because of the simple "You're doing great!". Once you criticize, you not only ruin your character but you also destroy the esteem of your children. Would children love to be around parents who criticize? Your children will start pulling away from you and turn to others and when this happens, you might not even have the slightest chance to do the things you wish you should have done.

So, nourish each relationship with a true and honest COMPLIMENT.  Plant these little seeds in their heart that these may grow to make them better children, and better people. Correct them when they do wrong, COMPLIMENT when they do right. Make every moment they have with you as pleasant as you can. They will remember these for always.

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Being a parent is indeed difficult. It means giving your 100%. It means putting their good ahead of yourself. It means more than just providing but rather sitting down, giving time, listening, communicating, and giving the constant affirmation they need.

I am not a parent but parenting as Pastor Tan-Chi says begins 20 years before. Your lifestyle, your character, your knowledge you have the tendency to bring to parenthood. So as much as possible even if we don't know what the future holds, if I become a parent or not, I should start correcting my ways in order to become if not the best parent, the best relational being I am made to be.

Every moment that passes is a moment lost forever. Cherish every moment with your children, teach them about Christ, spend time with them and really talk to them. Do not wait for the time that you wish you had done something. Do not wait for the time that you wish you had played with them more, talked to them more, be the mother or father more, be their friend more because you will never have that chance again.

Look back on good memories with your children, I haven't experienced it all yet but I know that it would probably be one of the best feelings and achievements in the world - that you have brought them to Christ, influenced them positively and then you would be at peace. You have done something good. You have done something right.

 

Feeding the Soul: Condemned to death but glory in Christ - Romans 7-9 (Part 3)

For our last chapter for the session, Chapter 9, we may not fully understand God's choice but we trust that all these will reveal his glory.

In this last and final chapter, we see here God's incomprehensible yet all too sovereign choice. He chose Jacob, whose name means "deceiver" instead of Esau. He chose to harden Pharaoh's heart to make it difficult for the Israelites to leave Egypt.

¹⁷ For Scripture says to Pharaoh: “I raised you up for this very purpose, that I might display my power in you and that my name might be proclaimed in all the earth

 Leading us then sometimes to ponder on God's choices. Why Jacob not Esau? Why make it tough for the Israelites to be released from Pharaoh's cruelty? But then we are again faced with this...

20 But who are you, a human being, to talk back to God? “Shall what is formed say to the one who formed it, ‘Why did you make me like this?’”^[h]21 Does not the potter have the right to make out of the same lump of clay some pottery for special purposes and some for common use?

All these things, God has created for a purpose. He raised up 12 tribes in the one who deceived, He raised up a King in a shepherd boy, He raised up a Savior in the one who was born in a manger.

These are the things that being limited as we are, we might not fully encompass and not fully grasp. But all these we should trust that it is so that we might believe, that our faith be strengthened, and that the glory of His name be justified.  It is not for us to judge who God calls or who God chooses, and believe me God has surprised me many times on those people he has used to remind me of Him and my mission to serve Him.

Just recently, a friend whom I never expected to speak about God surprised me by talking about Him with no apprehensions or any misgivings. I remember being very cautious in whom I share my faith with, particularly with her, since I know that not all are open about it. Some might be turned off or some might think I'm righteous and a hypocrite once sin gets the best of me. But here she was, doing what I was supposed to do - speaking boldly about Him without any fear of judgment,  and I felt even more ashamed when she asked on what religion I belonged to. Was I that not obvious on who was my God?  I was taken aback then 10,000 times.

But I know that through her, God has indeed spoken to me. God amazes me incredibly on whom He calls. I might feel the terrible unease of not reflecting Christ, I feel worse and sick to my gut, but I know that this is a wake up call for me to speak more about Him, embody Him and finally step up. I might not be a speaker or the best writer, or leader, or even a Christian there is. I might not even be the best person to testify about faith or about God because I am a sinner who tends to fall but with the Spirit residing in me and Christ in my heart I know that I can conquer all my shortcomings.

I am a child of God and I then take comfort in His word that I shall not fear, I shall not be ashamed, because I know that if I am for God, who can be against me indeed.

 

Feeding the Soul: Condemned to death but glory in Christ - Romans 7-9 (Part 2)

As we moved on to Chapter 8 we are given the promise of freedom from sin and death, suffering and life through Christ Jesus as we are God's adopted child.

In this chapter, 4 verses struck me.

(1)

⁵ Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires.

 It is so easy for us to act according to our nature, that is to heed to the call of being sinful. The simple act of judging others or saying one bad thing that would not only destroy the person but destroy your character as well. It is so easy to put one person down. This among many other things, is the constant  mind and deed of someone who lives according to the world, according to their sinful self. But if we are truly in the Spirit, then our minds are focused on what God desires.

This is not easy. WE WILL ALWAYS FALL. But take comfort that in our sincerest repentance, we are brought to the light once more.

 Before I act, I should STOP and THINK. Am I being my sinful self again? Is this what the Spirit desires of me? What would Christ have done in this moment?

(2)

 ¹⁷ Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory.

I am proud to be a child of God. But being a child of God does not just entail all the glory that goes with it. We all have to understand that as we share in Christ's glory, we also share in HIS sufferings. It is not an easy road for Christians. When attacked or when their faith is tested, some tend to get angry with God, or sulk or turn away from Him entirely.

As children of God, we have to face this: Persecution, Trials that will really test our faith, and Sufferings of many kind. But be comforted in God's promise that as children of God, though we may face these sufferings, there is glory - much greater, unimaginable and incomparable to the sufferings we are experiencing.

(3)

²⁸ And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

(4)

 ³¹ What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?

As we go through these sufferings, we also take pride in the fact that all good things come to those who love God. We may feel distressed at times with things that we don't understand, problems too big to even measure but we hold on to God's word that everything that happens is good, in the end it will be revealed as so.

As children of God, it also follows that as God is for us, who can be against us? Who am I to fear? Who am I to not take the challenges, sufferings and persecutions that might come my way? Who am I to lose faith that I cannot speak, or write, or work or lead all for God? When I know for a fact that God is with me all the way?

 I am deeply moved with how God has sacrificed His only son for us - imagine how much more God can give us all things? Imagine how much more strength, wisdom and knowledge He could give you and me all for our good and all for His greater glory?

God's love is indeed so great we become confident to take part in Christ's suffering and in the glory that is to come. Praise be to God forever and ever. Amen.

Feeding the Soul: Condemned to death but glory in Christ - Romans 7-9 (Part 1)

Last Wednesday was my first time to facilitate our Bible Study. Finally after almost 5 years of on and off BS (since the time of Ate Chen), Small Group both here in my church and with Achi Susanna and John, and then One on One with Son (praying for a consistent Wednesday session), it's probably about time that I take the reigns even if just for once.

In our BS we are already on Romans chapters 7-9.

In chapter 7 we are faced with the reality of sin.

In the first part of Chapter 7 it talks about the relation of law and sin.

⁹ Once I was alive apart from the law; but when the commandment came, sin sprang to life and I died

If before we knew not of  sin, we were lawless and we were alive. We did things  freely without the burden of consequences and without the idea of condemnation. But since we were given the law, sin was realized and we have to face the fact that we are subjected to it over and over again. Even if  we already know about God's law, and even if we want to obey Him for always, we are in this endless struggle of battling with our sinful nature, our sinful bodies.

Was it better then that we knew not about it? Was it better then that we not be Christians?  But then you have to understand that we will die. We then succumb to misery since we are in a constant battle within ourselves. BUT all is not lost, though our bodies may die, we are given HOPE that through the grace of Jesus Christ -  our soul will live through HIM.

Tidbit of the Day: He himself will be with me... Deuteronomy 31:23

This morning as I walked towards my station, I saw my co-worker Brian hunched on his seat and fussing about. Curious as I was, I asked him what he was busy with. Then he showed me a little square box that contained paper pieces of inspiring Bible verses. I'm really not a fan of bible cutting and choosing verses randomly but for whatever reason, he offered me to pick one and I did. On the little brown and square paper I picked it said...

 

"Be brave and steadfast... I myself will be with you" - Deuteronomy 31:23

I asked him what it could possibly mean. He jokingly said that I'd probably know by lunch time.  OK then. But 12 Noon passed and nothing really came up. I looked up the full verse on the net and here is what it said.

 

"Then the LORD commissioned Joshua, son of Nun, and said to him, "Be brave and steadfast, for it is you who must bring the Israelites into the land which I promised them on oath. I myself will be with you." - Deuteronomy 31:23

This led me then to read the whole chapter that consisted of this Bible verse. To summarize chapter 31, Moses was already about to die and the Lord was giving out final orders. Due to a sin that Moses committed, he wouldn't be able to see the promised land. So the Lord commissioned Joshua, son of Nun to lead the Israelites into this place. Strength and courage was required for Joshua to be able to carry out this huge task and responsibility. But the Lord is true to His word. In this verse He assured Joshua that He himself will be with His loyal servant as they walk into the promised land.  

 

I suddenly remembered what I read last night in Hebrews 6:16-20 which reaffirms the certainty of God's promise. God's word is alive and active today and everything He says is true.

 

What I got from all these then is that when God tells us to do something that may seem too big for us to comprehend, or too big for us to accomplish on our own - something beyond our capabilities, we should remain strong and steadfast because God himself will be with us. There is no need to fear or worry that we may be too little, or too weak, or too unequipped because we desire to live God's will and nothing else should matter, He is true to His promise - He guarantees His presence and His strength most especially in our biggest weaknesses...

 

Now that I've thought about it, there are a lot of times that I know I should do what I have to but I don't have the courage to push through. But keeping this verse to heart, I know that I would be able to do things unimaginable, things that I know I myself could not do in a million years even if I wanted to. The Lord is great, His might incomprehensible, He is my fortress and He is true. God indeed finds ways how to communicate these with me - whether it be in random verses or whatnots - and for me to be able to share these with you.

 

So let us trust in and live faithfully to God's leading in our lives, let Him be your strength as He is mine. And know that He is ALWAYS with you.